This is me

So Im reading a few blogs, No not anyone famous or any sports blogs, just some down to earth real people like I want to be. Friends of mine, but what these friends talk about their life or experiences, a thought or an epiphany (thats a big word for me and I spelled it right the first time) But no matter what they blog about I am blessed just by reading it. Because no matter what they type about it comes from the heart and its honest. Something that I have issues with. Just putting it out there take it or leave it. I hate rejection I hate being rejected or not fitting in to the crowd so I do whatever it takes to fit in and be a part. But its killing me I can't do it anymore I can put on a happy face but then when I'm at home I'm rude, hateful, and just not happy i look at myself as being a loser because i have to pretend to be something I'm not just to keep or make friends. Im tired of it i wanna be me, But not just me but I want to be the me that God wants me to be. I want to be Raphael McHenry that God has plans for to prosper to have a future and a hope. I have caught myself just sitting in my room wondering if i really go through with this how is everything gonna change. How many people are going to want to remove themselves from me but what i have decided is those people don't matter I want to know the people who are going to stick by me. I think I know who those people are but I guess now is as good of time as any to find out. I figure those who actually read this blog will take me for who I am no matter what because your actually taking the time to read this. I ask you to call me out if you think Im being fake or a people pleaser. To those that I read your blog I want to say Thank you. Your posts gave me courage to write this one and actually opened my eyes to what I have become.

So this is me I wanna be real which may mean that I'm raw if you get offended I'm not sorry cause thats just me. Im a gun carrying, God fearing, Southern boy, I have been reborn by the Grace of God and the BLOOD of Jesus. I hope you take me for who I truly am if not then its your loss not mine.